Did you know that on average, it takes a person 6 years of making the same New Year’s Resolution to actually succeed in keeping it?  If you’ve ever failed in your resolutions you’re obviously not alone, and let me assure you that there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with you – you simply don’t understand what you’re up against when you decide to change a habitual behavior.

All creatures, including humans, are very good at forming and using habitual patterns of behavior, and habits are formed for a reason – survival.  For example:

• When you’re hungry, you check the refrigerator (you know by habit that you’ll find food there). 
• When you’re bored you call your closest friend (you know by habit that she’ll go out with you on a moments notice). 
• When you need money you call mom (you know by habit that she’ll come to your rescue).
• When you want to pick up date in a local bar you use the same tactics (you know by habit which ones work).
• When you’re getting the jitters because you haven’t had a cigarette in an hour, you drop everything for a smoke break (you know by habit that this will take the edge off).

 
Obviously not all of these activities seem like they fall into the “survival” category, but they do.  If you had to go through the process of brainstorming resolutions, analyzing the potential for success, choosing a plan of action, and then testing through trial and error whether it would work EVERY time you were hungry, bored, needed money, wanted a date, or were “jonesing” how much do you think you’d accomplish each day?

 Habits save us from having to repetitively go through this process; they save us time, energy, and provide reliable, consistent results. The problem is that the results may not always be desirable; perpetuating a smoking, overeating, or compulsive spending habit may not be exactly the outcome you’re looking for, yet your habits do a very good job of accomplishing just that.

There is a reason why attempting to stick to your New Year’s Resolutions can be so difficult; when you try to replace ingrained, habitual patterns of behavior, you’re working against your brain’s programming.  Quite literally you have to retrain your brain to realize that the old habit is no longer serving a beneficial purpose – but your brain isn’t willing to do this without a struggle; its job is to protect and rely on the habits that it has learned.  They are so ingrained in fact that you don’t even think about what you’re doing – you just DO it.  Once you decide you’d like to change that process it requires an immense amount of awareness and resolve – first to catch yourself BEFORE you act, and then to remind yourself why you want to respond in a different manner.  This process can be uncomfortable, difficult, and exhausting. 

Don’t give up though – change IS possible.  Just remember that you’ll need support, a plan for helping yourself when the going gets tough, a reward for each baby step, and the willingness to work through it even when you think you can’t.